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Hello
this is : AELIS WORLD
welcome to the warped side of life.
enjoy(:
Profile
i am AELIS
aka SILEA
i love the FRENCH HORN & TRUMPET and the CELLO!
i love STCBAND! many instruments, one sound. many sections, one family!
i love the HORNS & TRUMPETS! GO HORNIES & TRUMPETERS!
i am currently in sec 4 ATOMIC! watch out, we'll blow you away!
i was born on ohfive onetwo ninefour. presents are always welcome(:
i am taking part in CHINGAY 2010! look out for me!
Tagboard
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Sunday, September 30, 2007 @7:50:00 AM
♥ aelispeaks:
hehehes. i have my history exam tmr. and my home ec. but i'm not studying. or sleeping early. i am such a genius. you know most geniuses dont even know how to spell genius. but i do. :D yes i am crapping like a lot i know. but i do not care. you chose to come to my blog. nmf. (not my fault) i shortened it since i use it alot...and it's cumbersome (not cucumbersome!) to write or type the whole thing out. lalalalalatestingtesting123 yep. s is for strikeout. i wanted to use it for my msn nic but wasn't sure. since i have been SUCH a good girl and not blogging. but still using the com. MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. yes i shall stop talking now.
then again...i'm not talking. i'm typing. and no i'm not one of those weird people who read out what they're gonna type or are typing so i'm NOT TALKINGG. LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALAAAAAAAAA~~~ yes i am being lame.
anyway. today, after totally murdering myself doing the retarded dreamweaver project ALL ON MY OWN with totally crappy infomation from certain people of which i could find a whole lot more, i was TORTURED FURTHER by my DARLING mother who made me do algebric equations in the retarded assesment book. i almost died. no correction. i DIED. and got revived by a certain someone....-huge grin- no i'm not telling you. go guess it yourself. and if you thought this post ended when i said i wasn't gonna talk slap yourself. why? cos...you're a retard? and dumb enough to notice that i didn't sign off with the somethingly yours silea. which also shows that you don't come to my blog enough. so what must you do?? yes. come to my blog more often. tho i may not have updated it, you still have to. why? becos you didn't notice the thingo. yes. thankyouverymuch. if i put a counter it would stay at 0 for like...forever? btw i'm trying to make you guilty so you'll come more often so you know what to do now right? yeps. you're almost a genius. like me. but almost. poor thing.
-sigh- i am bored. you'd better wish me good luck for all my exams tho i'm already a genius but geniuses make mistakes sometimes or you'll die. from whatever. gingivitis. isn't that a ginger cookie brand? i lovee ginger cookies. note the double e. but sadly my mom hasn't bought them in ages. i shall remind her soon. she likes them with coffee tho i think that's wasting 1. the ginger 2. money when she can buy normal ones with ginger coffee. LOL. ginger coffee. hahahahaha. my own invention. so you save money on cookies. thank you thank you. and now for my dramatic exit, i shall go play a game. hahahaha. good night people and good luck to all people having eoys. including me.
geniusly yours,
{siLEA}
Wednesday, September 26, 2007 @5:50:00 AM
♥ aelispeaks:
i thought of a way to continue the song. since it's like monday...then the next bit'll be today, a tuesday, i did it again or something like that. but i didn't so don't worry. it's just a way to continue the song. so.
Nights ago, barely Monday
I slashed my wrists…hey.
I didn’t expect the blade to be so sharp
Or for it to hurt so much
But compared to what I felt just then
It doesn’t really hurt…or maybe I’m round the bend.
When I didn’t see blood
I thought it was a dud
Like all the other times. Then the blood started to flow
Gently, on it, I started to blow.
Then the pain came
It hurt like when needles rain
All upon my skin
I swept everything into the bin
It hurt so much
I can’t even touch
it, for fear I burst out in pain.
Again.
then on tuesday, i did it again
this time there wasn't so much pain.
or maybe it was because i was getting numb
or i was just being dumb.
i really don't know anymore
life is becoming even more of a bore
now even the funniest joke
weighs on my shoulders like a yoke
that i can never again remove.
Then the blood started to flow
Gently, on it, I started to blow.
Then the pain came
It hurt like when needles rain
All upon my skin
I swept everything into the bin
It hurt so much
I can’t even touch
it, for fear I burst out in pain.
Again.
(that's the chorus btw)
wednesday, i was getting worse.
i felt like i was going to burst
all my emotions
just crying out for attention
but not getting any
not even from my favorite teddy
all of them, i had to hide
from the outside
on which i appeared to have none.
then the blood started to flow
Gently, on it, I started to blow.
Then the pain came
It hurt like when needles rain
All upon my skin
I swept everything into the bin
It hurt so much
I can’t even touch
it, for fear I burst out in pain.
Again.
tonight, thursday.
i stared at the scissors till i started to fray
i shook my head and grabbed them
and dragged it across my skin like slicing ham
but this time round, i somehow couldn't do it.
it did bleed, but just a tiny bit
tiny drops of blood on my skin
made me wanna plunge the scissors in
deep. but i couldn't.
then the blood started to flow
Gently, on it, I started to blow.
Then the pain came
It hurt like when needles rain
All upon my skin
I swept everything into the bin
It hurt so much
I can’t even touch
it, for fear I burst out in pain.
Again.
the end. yeps. and now sian is counting 1 min so i gotta go. BYE. -bows and takes leave-
songingly yours,
{siLEA}
Monday, September 24, 2007 @5:53:00 AM
♥ aelispeaks:beginning of another song.
ow. it hurts. inside and out. anyway. here's another song...or at least the beginning of it. 2 paragraphs or whatever you call it. verses?
Last night, barely a Monday
I slashed my wrists…hey.
I didn’t expect the blade to be so sharp
Or for it to hurt so much
But compared to what I felt just then
It doesn’t really hurt…or maybe I’m round the bend.
When I didn’t see blood
I thought it was a dud
Like all the other times. Then the blood started to flow
Gently, on it, I started to blow.
Then the pain came
It hurt like when needles rain
All upon my skin
I swept everything into the bin
It hurt so much
I can’t even touch
it, for fear I burst out in pain.
Again.
my mom says she wants to know me...that she doesn't know me. but what can i tell her? when all she'll do is tell me off. and not really help at all. she still thinks i'm with rod. she keeps talking about him...doesn't know that it still hurts me. she doesn't know i got another guy. but that was over fast. and now i'm still messed up. kinda. trying not to be. but it's hard. she doesn't know anything, doesn't understand me. and when i show a little of it she thinks i'm just being 'bad' and scolds. she said 'i don't know you. you're being brought up by your friends, your friend's parents...' yeah. so what? is that such a bad thing? i have many friends. i get different experiences, more than you can ever give me. you just want me to be 'perfect' 'hardworking' 'good'. yeah. why don't you try living my life for a while...feel what i feel. you know in the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy, they found that gun which lets the person you 'shoot' know what you feel and think? well if i had that gun i'd shoot her a million times over. but then...i bet she still wouldn't understand. she'd be all 'parent-y' and look at it from an 'adult's point of view'. or something like that. it really hurts...when she doesn't understand.
take tonight for example. i was doing art and listening to music, so when she yelled i didn't hear. then i thought i heard something so i paused the music to listen. nothing. i was about to play it again, then she yelled for me to come out. so i did. then she told me to take in my bags bla bla bla. she said 'we want to have dinner. take away your bag etc...' note: we want to have dinner. not anything like 'we're going to have dinner soon... can you clear your stuff?' like it's sian and her who want to eat and my opinion, if i'm stuffed so full i'll get indigestion doesn't matter. then after i did clear it, i went back to my frustrating art.
then once i finished, i thought, 'hey. aren't we supposed to be having dinner?' so i walk out to check. and guess what? they're in front of the tv...yeah...dinner. eating their fill of the show. and i stand there for like...1 min and she doesn't turn or say 'ok let's eat.' she doesn't even notice i'm there.
so since they're watching tv i go into the room and finish my book. then while i'm reading i hear her yell 'chi fan le!' which is time to eat in chinese btw. but since sian is there to help, and she has delayed for so long anyway, i go on reading. then sian comes in and flips the quilt and says (harshly) 'dinner is ready. can you come and help set the table?' like WHAT? are you DISABLED so you can't do it yourself?? then when he flips the quilt, my mom's handbag slides off and a metal bit hits my ankle. hard. so obviously it hurts. alot. so when he walks out i cry a little. but again no one notices.
then i walk into the toilet, where i suddenly start tearing. yes i know it's a bad place but whatever. but i stop, and walk out. so i scoop the rice etc etc etc. and we start to eat. there's curry but it looks hot so i don't try it. there's pumpkin which i thought i might try. but it isn't offered to me. the only things that are said are pass the plate etc. so i take the carrots first since mom is taking the fishcake. i take one bite and (no not because of the taste or flavor) i start tearing again. i try to stop but can't. so i get up and go to the toilet again. she does not notice.
this time it takes longer to stop tearing, but when i do i flush the toilet and wash my hands...so it doesn't seem weird. then i go out and finish my dinner. nothing else is said to me. so i walk back into the room where my art is. it looks hopeless. like all my other artworks. but i see the scissors there...so i pick it up. i meant to make small scratches...like i usually do. but this one is sharper...so i didn't think i had scratched to much. but i don't feel anything till it starts bleeding. then it starts to smart a little. so i come to the com...sudden inspiration for a song. so there it is, the first two stanzas/verses of my latest song. and now i shall go publish this post. night people.
hurtingly yours,
{silea}
Sunday, September 09, 2007 @9:53:00 PM
♥ aelispeaks:it.
omg HAHAHAHA. IT class in small font is it. it class. HAHAHA. ok sorry. =X but yeah i am in it class and my fingers are so numb i can't type properly. grr. i hate the dreamweaver project. i mean dreamweaver is great. but there's no free download anymore and not all of us can stay back in school! our project chooser person sucks man. be a little considerate can?? gr. i'm thinking of using blogger but editing the html so it looks like a normal website. haha. i know that's totally cheating but it's the same isn't it? i still get the stupid thing done. and in time too. animator vs animation 2 is loading but it's taking forever. it's only 35% after like 5 mins. oh well. at least it's loading. hahaha. gosh. freak actually goes to mocca.com. i mean, it's crap. like seriously. what's she looking for? a job offer to a hair salon so she can get a free hairstyle? i shan't say anymore. honestly. the things people'll do for a free haircut.
yours,
{siLEA}
Friday, September 07, 2007 @3:35:00 AM
♥ aelispeaks:so sad.
haha. this is so sad. like hardly anyone finds my red dragon thing funny anymore. except me and sam. hahaha. today in band after 1 hr of drills more like 1 lifetime, really we went in and played games. i think serena wanted to play truth or dare but couldn't cos it was band time and not everyone would want to like reveal their secrets in front of everyone so yeah. so we did something like it. it was like questions about band and music. so...yeah.
then after that peebee, xuan ya, kasier (sorry i don't know how to spell your name) and dAnica had to do forfeit. miss tan suggested everyone say one line...then they had to act out whatever they said. super hilarious. when it reached a whole row of sec 1s they made them sit down then stand up then sit down then stand up. super funny. then jia hui didn't know what to say so i said 'make them stand up and play leap frog!' which is like...1 person squat down and the others take turn to jump over. and over and over. haha. it's FUN ok. but they didn't know and when they did get it they didn't wanna for fear of kicking each other. then jia hui had to think of 2 other things then they did it.
then my turn. i wanted to say 'they turned into a big red dragon (cos of the miss tan thing) and xuan ya was the head and peebee the butt.' haha. but sam said to say 'then the big red dragon came and breathed fire on them' but they would die but they couldn't in the game so i said 'then the big red dragon came and tried to eat them.' and i was grinning like some idiot but they didn't get it. T.T i think miss tan did but she didn't say anything. then they were like no no no big red dragon. something else. then since earlier on someone 'used' miss tan as a old witch so i said 'then the evil witch came back and turned them into frogs. for real.' then miss tan was 'I'M OLD NOT EVIL.' hahaha. but in the end i...oh. i can't even remember what i said. haha.
but it was seriously funny la. they did stuff like dance cancan, pull each other's hair, throw tantrum. haha. i wanted sam to join in cos i knew she would say something completely evil but she didn't. aw. haha.
after that in band prac...oh yeah. i have to remember to STOP SQUEEZING. and to stop pressing my mouthpiece to get a higher sound. but it's like seriously hard sometimes. and since i have to play high C quavers and high D quavers in Last Christmas last christmas i gave you my heart...the very next day you gave it away.... staccato too. but i will keep trying. and i need to get my pitching right for all the chords. i'm so bringing back my horn on monday. good thing there's still practice on monday...i'm gonna miss band so much during the exams. stupid exams. make us mug like mad then dont even let us go to band to relax. grrrrr.
oh well. serene smiled at least 5 times today. hahahahaha. i think she was more relaxed. i think. haha. i just realized. i haven't been saying oh well when i used to say it almost every other line. haha. good then. i don't sound like some old lady. :x haha. i had oreo mc flurry today. :D and now i'm drinking BUBBLE TEA. haha. well actually it's just green apple ice blended with green apple jelly. i always order that. haha. and today after band i ate ebiko and that...that triangle sushi with crabstick inside. haha. i can't remember what that's called. what's roe? are they like eggs? i mean ebiko is prawn roe so what's roe? oh well. NOO. I'M 'OH WELL'ING AGAIN. ahhhhhh. erase erase erase. -scrubs com screen- hahahahhaha. ok i'm being lame. and being bored. ok i'll go play something. or maybe i'll just sleep. but it's only 8.30. oh well. later then. bye people.
bubble teaingly yours,
{siLEA}
p.s 88 more days to my birthday! (or 87. or 89. i dunno!!)
Tuesday, September 04, 2007 @9:16:00 PM
♥ aelispeaks:i'm bored.
yes. i know. when was my last post? oh gosh. august 28. and what's today's date? 5th of September. oooh. exactly 3 more months to my birthday!! yay. haha. unfortunately i shall be in nz if i cannot persuade my mom to let me stay in singapore for my birthday and the year end concert. but...i may miss my birthday, but she is thinking of letting me come back for the year end concert. which is a totally good thing. :D
lets see...oh yeah. i had wanted to post on tuesday cos i went with parveen to her mom's childcare centre to help out. and that day, dustbins loved me. like really. in the morning i bought breakfast at mac then when they came to pick me up, i threw away the wrapper thing and my hp fell in too. i was like oh crap. then i just quickly reached in (ew) and grabbed it out. luckily it didn't fall all the way in. then also later that day, i can't remember now but something else happened with a dustbin which was kinda ew too. haha. but the younger kids were totally cute.
hmm. then today...there was oral. like everyone else, i think i screwed up. anyway, then me parveen and siyi went to Vivo. (which was amazing cos we had no idea how to in the first place) then we just walked around and around and i was dying cos i had my horn with me and now my left hand is totally blistered. oh yeah. we went to hagen dais (or however you spell it) and i spent 9.90 on a mango sherbet smoothie kinda thingo and parveen and siyi shared a 16.90 banana split. i swear the banana was so small they didn't even see it. until they started eating that is. then we started playing with the cherry and the cream and it dropped into parveen's cup. haha. then it turned whitish and it fizzed. cool huh. then we were laughing like mad (or at least parveen was). finally we finished the ice cream and left.
then we walked and walked and walked. then since candy empire wasn't open till 11am, we went to toys r us. it was kinda fun...but not as fun as that time me and parveen went to the jp one. haha. then...after toys r us we went to candy empire! haha. i bought ooze toobz which by the way is not 1. gel 2. toothpaste 3. sunblock. hahaha. and i bought this...thing. haha. it was raspberry stick with sherbet inside. yum. really. i love sherbet. haha. then parveen and siyi bought a whole ton of sour stuff. haha. then we had to rush back for my band at 12 but because they didn't believe that the only train leading out of vivo would bring us to tiong i was late. well i was at the bus stop at 11.45 but that was fall in time so yeah.
when i did reach school i was late for band so yeah. thank god it was Xinyi who was 'in charge' so she didn't punish me. =X haha. then we did drills...i think i shouted loud. i think. haha. but caszella was trying...and serene, well, i think she's like embarrassed. i'm not sure. but like xuan ya said, just let everyone look at you. haha. jia you tho serene. then....we went into the canteen cos it started drizzling. the echo was super loud but it was just an echo...it wouldn't be half as loud if we were in the hard court. the N level people were staring at us. haha. then...we went in and set up...did some bach thingo. then we (normal stream sec 1s) left for lit class tho it was total crap. and for someone who actually might like lit (the subject not the teacher) it seriously crap. i was doodling and dozing. d and d. hahaha. anyway, when we got back then...we tried mary's boy child....the bar 85 (or 58) is going to kill us all. all horn players that is. the lowest note is Aflat and the highest is...high G? pls la i can barely reach high F let alone high G. but sam is saying can anyhow press get the same sound so hopefully we'll be spared remembering the sequence of fingerings. haha.
then....aiya nothing much happened after that. stephanie came back with me and the seniors...but i think she was uncomfortable. oh well. and i was eating my ooze toobz and all the seniors were like 'why are you eating gel' 'it looks like toothpaste' 'no it looks like sunblock!' HELLO DO I LOOK LIKE I WOULD EAT GEL TOOTHPASTE OR SUNBLOCK??? and no sam i would not like it in my hair thankyouverymuch. but it was still kinda fun la. hopefully stephanie will come with us again...she's quite fun. :D
ok yes i know today is like 6th sept but i wanted to post this on the 5th. really. anyway, 89 more days to my birthday:D the countdown is starting. hahaha. ok i'm gonna play a game or something. dying of boredom. haha. ttfn people.
gamingly yours,
{siLEA}
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